Like many, when I reflect on “preparation”, my thoughts immediately jump to preparing for the arrival of Zachary, my nine-month-old son.
Those that know me know that I was nervous about getting too excited or preparing too early for his arrival. It had not been the easiest journey and I was always waiting for something to go wrong but as the months passed and he and I both were healthy, it seemed like this was actually going to happen.
Once I accepted that we really were going to be bringing a little one into our family we set about gathering the stuff that one needs (which really is not much at all) and then a lot of the stuff that the marketing departments and big box stores also say are necessities.
We set up the co sleeper upstairs and the pack and play downstairs, washed the onsies, sleepers, and blankets and set up the car seat. We filled the bureau drawers with bibs, burp clothes, cloth diapers, cloth wipes and little clothes. We packed a bag for me with a cute one-piece sleeper to bring our tiny one home in.
Through all this, I was very aware that I was also preparing in ways that were not as obvious. I was preparing for a change in my identity, a change in my lifestyle, a change in my marriage. It was when I was trying to prepare for these changes that sometimes anxiety would sneak up on me or a wave of fear would wash over me.
I could not grasp how drastic these changes would be but I knew, even in those days that no matter how much I prepared, I would never really be ready for such incredible changes. Thankfully, I also knew that with God’s help I would be able to navigate these changes when they arrived. I just had to have faith that He would be there and I needed to keep my heart, mind and ears open.
Here we are nine months later and I continue to ask God daily for help navigating these unchartered waters. I am grateful that I realized that the most important part of preparing for this joyous but colossal life change was to turn to my faith and know that God was going to and continues to be there with me, I just have to stay open.
Amber Page Gehr
Those that know me know that I was nervous about getting too excited or preparing too early for his arrival. It had not been the easiest journey and I was always waiting for something to go wrong but as the months passed and he and I both were healthy, it seemed like this was actually going to happen.
Once I accepted that we really were going to be bringing a little one into our family we set about gathering the stuff that one needs (which really is not much at all) and then a lot of the stuff that the marketing departments and big box stores also say are necessities.
We set up the co sleeper upstairs and the pack and play downstairs, washed the onsies, sleepers, and blankets and set up the car seat. We filled the bureau drawers with bibs, burp clothes, cloth diapers, cloth wipes and little clothes. We packed a bag for me with a cute one-piece sleeper to bring our tiny one home in.
Through all this, I was very aware that I was also preparing in ways that were not as obvious. I was preparing for a change in my identity, a change in my lifestyle, a change in my marriage. It was when I was trying to prepare for these changes that sometimes anxiety would sneak up on me or a wave of fear would wash over me.
I could not grasp how drastic these changes would be but I knew, even in those days that no matter how much I prepared, I would never really be ready for such incredible changes. Thankfully, I also knew that with God’s help I would be able to navigate these changes when they arrived. I just had to have faith that He would be there and I needed to keep my heart, mind and ears open.
Here we are nine months later and I continue to ask God daily for help navigating these unchartered waters. I am grateful that I realized that the most important part of preparing for this joyous but colossal life change was to turn to my faith and know that God was going to and continues to be there with me, I just have to stay open.
Amber Page Gehr